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notsira:

ariaste:

unamusedsloth:

Exercise caution, especially with things labeled “fresh” pizza

I dunno, I’m most worried about “stairs”

I used to go around at night and put random quotation marks on signs around my town

Walk-ins “welcome”

Buy one “get” one free

Watch the “game” here (quotations also good around watch and here)

The office birthday person (who didn’t like me very much) got me a cake that said, Happy Birthday “Christina” … Which IS my name. I was too scared to eat the cake.

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